He wishes he had never entered the funhouse. But he has. Then he wishes he were dead. But he's not. Therefore he will construct funhouses for others and be their secret operator - though he would rather be among the lovers for whom funhouses are designed.
'Like what?' Heather asked. 'What educational ideas are no good?'
'I think I have believed that if I waited, if I sat quietly at the table, without making a noise or movement - being good - the dish of life would be presented to me.'
Hanif Kureishi, "Goodbye, Mother"
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